Dancing in Their Palms
by White Sledgehammer
Summary: With a peculiar host, the Kuroshitsuji cast must try to overcome the obstacles placed upon them by these entities named "reviewers". Sanity is all they have left. Warning: Spoilers. Lots and lots of them. Read at your own risk.
1. Chapter 1

In some unknown, dark location were two figures. One certainly taller than the other; the smaller one wearing something giant and frilly from the waist down; and the taller stranger lean and stiff, only a semicircle sticking out of what seemed to be their pocket.

?: Hello everyone! Welcome to your typical Kuroshitsuji—

?: And for the people who don't know. Also known as Black Butler—

?: —Truth or Dare type of thing!

?: My Queen, you should really be more considerate.

Queen(?): Ash! You ruined my identity! How could you?

Ash(?): Oh. I thought…

Queen(?): No! *crosses arms* Now everything is ruined!

Ash: *sighs* (I don't get paid enough for this). As my Queen was saying, this is a Truth or Dare game which are very common…well, everywhere. What you basically do is send a review about what you want a certain or multiple characters to do. There is only one rule: no killing off any characters. Which is why the Queen and I are somehow alive.

Queen: That's right!

Ash: O_O

Queen: I am Queen Victoria!

Ash: From the anime.

Queen Victoria (anime): What? What do you mean?

Ash: It's complicated.

Queen Victoria: ?

Ash: Now, the whole cast isn't here right now. But in the next segment all shall be present—well, we'll _try._ We might forget some.

Victoria: But! If you want them here, then we'll send them. I _am _the Queen after all!

Ash: Anime-Queen.

Victoria: What is this _anime _that you speak of?!

Ash: *bows* Nothing, my Queen. Shouldn't you be wearing your veil?

Victoria: Why? Everyone already knows what I look like.

Ash: (You look creepy).

Victoria: And that's about it! Hopefully we'll have tons of fun with this little…_game. _*psychotic smile*

Ash: O_O Help me…

And so the angel Ash whispered something to the dark. Strangely, a darkened area that had appeared to be empty emitted a red light. These red lights took in the shape of eyes, separate in their own bodies, showing another color—white—at each other as they glanced around, whispering words of knowledge. The _reviewers _had begun to take action.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Yep! Here you go! _Another _Black Butler Truth or Dare! Aren't you happy that there's so many of these out there? Normally I wouldn't do this (laziness, man) but I have my reasons. I hope you like the thought of Anime!Queen Victoria being the host of this, along with her hermaphrodite angel Ash. You know why? Because I don't feel like making an OC. So why not our beloved child Queen that _for some reason _killed Ciel's parents? Why not!

Everyone who died in the original anime (or manga) is now magically back from the dead. Everyone is alive and well. But that doesn't mean that they're happy about their deaths. Second season characters are available as well.

Manga characters are also acceptable, which is why there will be comments about the Manga!Queen Victoria being so much better than the anime one.

Note that _some _manga characters might not be so accurately portrayed. I will try my best though. Yay.

No killing off characters, no matter _how _much you hate them! Trust me…I'd do the same but then I'd feel bad :(

(Ha! No I wouldn't!)


	2. Fixing Walls

Queen Victoria walked up the lady behind the counter. The old bulky woman stared down at the girl; she was upset that the victorious Queen of England had such a youthful appearance. It didn't matter; she still had to give her the mail she received. Once Victoria saw the woman pull out a letter, her breath hitched, and her heart started to beat rapidly against her chest. When the fragile piece of paper touched the Queen's gloved hands, she ran off, bidding a quick thank you.

Queen Victoria: I got a letter! *waves the letter at Ash's face* In your face!

Ash: You know, just because you look like a small child, doesn't mean you should act like one.

Victoria: …I know where you live.

Ash: O-Okay…? Who's the letter to?

Victoria: I don't know! *jumping up and down* I'm so excited!

Ash: Open it.

Victoria: No! First things, first—the cast!

Ash: *sigh* You're annoying.

Victoria: At least I'm not confused.

Ash: What?

Victoria: Exactly!

Ash: *dramatic sigh* I'll go call the Phantomhive and Trancy manor.

Victoria: Make sure to invite _everyone! _

Ash: …No.

Victoria: D:

ABRUPT TRANSITION

Sebastian: *opens door* Here you go, My Lord.

Ciel: I wonder why the Queen would want us to come here… And why did I have to bring _them_?

Mey-Rin: This place is rather spacious, yes!

Bard: Looks pretty suspicious if you ask me.

Finny: You think anyone's home?

Ciel: The Queen should be here. *looks around* I wonder where, though…

Ash: *appears out of nowhere* Hello, Lord Phantomhive. You are the first to arrive. We are still waiting for everyone to appear.

Ciel: Very well. *begins to walk but then is glomped from behind* What the—?

Elizabeth: Ciel~! You're here too?!

Ciel: Li-Lizzie?

Lau: Ah, Earl, I see you're here too.

Ciel: Lau?! You were invited too? Why?

Lau: Beats me. Right, Ran Mao?

Ran Mao: *nods like a boss*

Ash: Ah, more people. Come this wa—

Alois: CIEEEEL!

Ciel: Oh no—

Alois: You were invited too?!

Claude: Why are you acting surprised? You only became because he was inv—

Alois: I had no idea!

Hannah: *is silent*

Sebastian: My, my, this place is becoming crowd—

Grell: Oh, Sebas-chaaaaan~!

Sebastian: *twitches*

Grell: *breaks through the wall*

Ash: *twitches because he has to fix that later*

Grell: *fangirling* Oh, Sebas-chan! I'm so glad you're here! Hopefully we'll have tons *winks* of *winks again* fun! *blows kiss*

Sebastian: *dodges* Please refrain from doing such disturbing things.

Grell: Oh— *back of his head is stabbed with clipper*

William: Honestly, we aren't here to fool around.

Grell: *is too busy bleeding*

Ciel: …

Sebastian: Is something wrong, Young Master?

Ciel: So…many…people.

Lau: *already sitting on a large couch* Anyways…what are we here for?

Ciel: Pay attention to where you're invited to, at least!

William: Hm, it seems there are vermin around…

Grell: Wha?

William: Three to be exact.

Ciel: *sigh* When can we see the Queen?

Ash: When everyone has arrived.

Ciel: Who's missing?

Ash: Let me check. *has a random list* A lot of others.

Ciel: Can we just meet the Queen already? If they're late, then they're late.

Ash: *checks random pocket watch* I don't know if the Queen will be happy about that.

Alois: Oh c'mon, Ciel! Don't be so impatient!

Ciel: Go away.

Alois: D: …CLAUDE, CIEL TOLD ME TO GO AWAY.

Claude: That's great.

Alois: D: …Hannah, Claude's not caring about me!

Hannah: *smiling sympathetically* What would you like me to do about it, Your Highness?

Alois: … D: CLAUDE, HANNAH'S BEING WEIRD.

Ciel: *already has a headache* Please tell me this is everyone.

Snake: Sorry we're late, there was something wrong with the parking…says Oscar.

Ciel: *to Ash* Hey, what about now?

Ash: *shakes head*

Ciel: Who's missing then?!

Lau: My, my. You seem to have quite a temper, Earl.

Ciel: I'm not very patient.

Grell: Sebas-chan, let me bear your children!

Sebastian: No.

William: *stabs Grell again* Stop making a mocking of the title Shinigami, Sutcliff.

Ronald: *breaks another part of the poor wall* HELLO, PEOPLES.

Ciel: Is _that _all?

Prince Soma: *to the hole in the wall* Hey look Agni, there's already an entrance for us!

Agni: Be careful Prince, it might collapse.

Ash: *has Ronald on his list*

Ciel: Why were you two so late?!

Prince Soma: *now notices Ciel* CIEL! YOU'RE HERE! *tries to glomp Ciel, but evidently fails and falls on the ground* Ow.

Ciel: *is too pissed to be randomly glomped* Now?

Ash: N—

Ronald: What type of party is this?

William: It's not.

Ronald: …Then why am I here? Why are _you _here?

Queen Victoria: Welcome everyone!

Everyone: *turns to the voice*

Queen Victoria: *finally appears* Glad to see so many people present!

ABRUPT TRANSITION

Victoria: *has explained the situation*

Ciel: So you're telling me…that we have to do what random people tell us…because?

Victoria: It'll be fun!

Ciel: *shrugs* Alright.

Alois: O_O You just agree so simply?!

Ciel: If the Queen says so.

Ash: Anime-Queen.

Victoria: *death glare*

Prince Soma: Do we have any truths or dares yet?

Victoria: Actually we do! *holds up the letter* One!

Elizabeth: Oh! I hope it's a cute one!

Everyone besides Lizzie: *are confuzzled by her comment*

Victoria: Alright, let's open this! *opens it*

**Does the character happened anytime, or in order of appearances? Other wise, I did have a question for one character. *rolled out a big piece of paper* I hope it isn't personal**

**Dear Undertaker,**

**I am one of your big fans and there are many reasons. Many girls like you because of your eyes, but I notice something truly important. You made those zombies and smiled all the time is because loneliness surrounded you like smoke and ashes. You just want a friend and being a acquaintance isn't enough for you, so I want to ask you this,**

**Can I be your best friend?**

**One of your big fans,**

**Madison Witkowski (Mad-Hatter-ison)**

Victoria: Undertaker! Come on out!

Random crickets: *are doing their chirping job*

Victoria: What? Where is he?

Ash: He doesn't seem to be here…

Victoria: WHAT? I TOLD YOU TO GET _EVERYBODY._

Ash: It's not my fault! Lord Phantomhive was being impatient!

Ciel: Don't blame this on me!

Claude: Yeah, don't blame it on him!

Alois: Claude, what the hell?

Sebastian: *to Claude* I'm watching you…

William: Actually… *taps a random coffin with his Death Scythe* someone's right here.

Victoria: …Since when do we have a coffin?

Coffin: *creaks open*

Ash: Since when do coffin's creak?

Undertaker: *creepy laugh* Hello.

Victoria: *hides behind Ash*

Undertaker: *gets out of coffin* *notices Ciel* Ah, hello Earl.

Ciel: Undertaker, I'm surprised you're here.

Undertaker: Me too, but I decided to have some fun.

Ash: (Is that everyone's purpose for attending this torture chamber?)

Lizzie: Did you hear the letter?

Undertaker: Why, yes I did.

Lizzie: …Well?

Undertaker: Oh, right! The response. Silly me. *answers* My eyes? Is that why fangirls like me?

Grell: Can't blame them! *fangirling again* Your eyes are gorgeous!

Undertaker: *signature laugh* I guess they are. Thank you for the compliment. I did make those zombies smile, didn't I?

Alois and everyone else who wasn't there: *is disturbed*

Undertaker: They were simply beautiful, weren't they? The way their bodies would move with such grace, blindly looking for someone to mark with their teeth.

Victoria: *is shivering*

Undertaker: And it's true, I would like to have an acquaintance—a friend—someone to talk to. It gets so lonely in the funeral parlor. *adorable sad face* Earl barely visits me anymore.

Alois: That's mean, Ciel.

Ciel: Oi! Don't go blaming me for not visiting everyday!

Sebastian: That's very rude, Young Master.

Ciel: What the—

Undertaker: Why thank you! I would love it if you become my best friend. You can visit me whenever you'd like, and we would have fun with our "guests".

Lizzie: "Guests"?

Ciel: It's what he calls the deceased.

Undertaker: We'll have fun removing their organs.

Lizzie: *hugs Ciel because, man, Undertaker is awesomely creepy*

Undertaker: *signature giggle* I hope you were satisfied with my answer. I'll be going now. *starts to get back in coffin, notices Victoria, stares without smiling, and goes back inside his coffin*

Prince Soma: That was…interesting.

Ciel: That's the Undertaker.

Victoria: Does he hate me or something?

Lau: I don't think he's very fond of you.

Victoria: Why? What did I do wrong!?

Ciel: Nothing.

Victoria: *is terrible confused*

Alois: You'll get used to it. People hate me for no good reason!

Ciel: Oh, people hate you for a _good _reason.

Alois: What? D: Why?

Ciel: You're annoying.

Alois: You're mean.

Viscount Druitt: *flies through one of the holes in the wall* I'M FABULOUS.

Everyone: O_O

Druitt: Don't worry ladies and gentlemen, I am here!

Victoria: *snappy attitude* You're late!

Druitt: Sorry my dear robin, I was dealing with some…_matters._

Ash: This is Queen Victoria. (And she's not _dear _or a _robin_.)

Druitt: *grabs Victoria's hand and kneels down* I'm sure you are, my little robin. One day, you will be a great queen, indeed.

Victoria: *irritated* I AM THE QUEEN.

Druitt: Whatever you want. *winks*

Victoria: Ash, get him out!

Ash: *gets him out*

Victoria: Hmph!

Paula: Hi! :D

Ciel: …That was the only letter.

Sebastian: It seems so.

Ciel: Now what?

Lizzie: Let's all dress up!

Alois: YEAH.

Ronald: Let's throw a party!

Alois: YEAH.

Prince Soma: Let's eat some curry!

Alois: I've never tasted that, or heard of that before, but—YEAH. NEW EXPERIENCES.

Everyone besides the stoics: YEAH!

Ciel: Queen, was that really all?

Victoria: Yep! Hopefully we get some more next time! *winks to the camera*

* * *

**Author's Note: **I know, there were more people missing, but hey! I tried my best! Thank you, Mad-Hatter-ison, for reviewing! I hope I answered your first question.

Next time!


End file.
